Saturday, September 27, 2008

Perceptions... Part 1

It’s been a really interesting week in the Clay Nation…

And now that my retinas have been utterly burned and rendered useless by the 7,000 posts I’ve just read over at the official fan site… well let’s just say how very glad I am that one doesn’t need one's eyesight to type. (I love that little raised thingamabopper they always put on the keyboard F & J keys…)

The posts have pretty much run the gamut of A – Z in regards to emotions and opinions, with several finding comfort (or discomfort) zones at the very opposite extremes. But of course there have also been the many voices of reason... with one of the very gentlest being the voice of Clay.

I would love so much to be able to quote his post here, but that’s not within my rights. However, the gist of it was that we should all try to keep an open mind in regards to the many differing opinions and how he knew this would be very, very difficult for some. That we were allowed to say anything we wanted to about him, but that we should more continue to support each other. He also said that as much as he appreciates the intentions… we do not need to defend him. He’ll be okay.

So, why is all of this just breaking my heart? I truly feel it should be a cause for celebration. He’s still the same person he’s always been... except for probably a little happier... eventually. Nothing else at all has changed. Not for me. So I’m confused. I didn’t realize this would merit an upheaval of such great magnitude.

Here are a couple of things I posted on the day the ‘big’ announcement… So just for memrie's sake.

I felt socked in the gut for about 5 seconds, just because that FONT was so big, but then I just felt such a tremendous sense of relief for him. The timing is about as perfect as it could ever get... with the support of his cast right now. And thank God it would all just be over and done with. It just completely makes sense. So much lead up to this...[snip]

Anyway, I really don't know what to say! But whatever it would be... it would be positive.

Gawd, I'm just really happy for him right now. Can't explain it.
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I know I just posted... But also, just had an epiphany.

I have about 150 comments on my YouTube account which include the word Gayken. So I'm hoping that maybe they will cease and desist a bit now.

Wasn't it he who said "They can’t laugh at you if you laugh at yourself first... blah blah blah." Could somebody help me out with that quote? I'm too lazy right now to dig to the bottom of my tupperware box. It's in "Learning To Sing" I think.
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I am just hugely relieved that he finally did this. I think it was about 3 years ago when I just felt that this was the authentic Clay, but I didn't know if I'd live long enough to see him to finally take the step. I think having his precious little baby boy probably sealed the deal for him. I'll bet he feels like a huge weight has been lifted off his shoulders.

I don't think I've ever loved him as much as I do right now. The way I look at it, is that when he came off of Idol, he was a "green" nobody from Raleigh who suddenly got thrust onto the national stage with no preparation for how to deal with the media, etc. He probably was given "advice" about how to field certain questions but didn't think about the long-term ramifications of his chosen words. I’m sure he's regretted some of the things he's said over the years in interviews and wishes he could go back and rephrase them a bit. Which I'm sure we've all wished we could do at some point time. In a perfect world…

We just all see things SO differently… It doesn't mean anyone's wrong. Not at all.

Next up… My own E-True Story. hahaha

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