Sunday, February 22, 2009

Not Just Us...


This was just brought to my attention by a good friend who frequently surfs the web. *Not that I don't... but probably just not as frequently as she does.*

And it made me sit up in my seat a bit... and maybe even pout a little. But either way, it for sure took me back to 2003. Big time!

And what a grand time that was!

Anyway, here goes: Courtesy of Bitten By A Cougar...



Arm Porn: - David Cook's arms shown off in a short-sleeved shirt, especially a t-shirt. Can cause 'plosions.
Audition Fauxhawk: - the red-streaked quasi-mohawk David wore at his first audition with the judges.
BAD: - Beleaguered Advocates of Debedazzlement. DC fans who prefer DC wearing less bling.
Bling: - necklaces, crystalline belt buckles and other shiny accessories worn by OABO.
Blingtrance: - Inability to look directly at or speak to David Cook because you are blinded by the shiiininess of his bling.
Bouffantom of the Opera: - Somewhat bouffant hairstyle David wore when he sang Music of the Night on Top 6 (Andrew Lloyd Weber) week.
Bromance: - describing the relationship between David Cook and Michael Johns.
Bus-stalking: – When an Idol fan waits patiently, often for hours, hoping to see and meet their favorite Idol.
Bus-throwing: – Simon Cowell’s gratuitously cruel criticism of David Cook’s performances (especially The World I Know) on Top 2 Night.
Cookified: - (a) What happens when David rearranges a song. (b) David's skills as a hairdresser in the Best Week Ever skit. (c) The assimilation of countless relatives, friends, strangers, nonfans, cats and budgies into being willing adoring slaves of David Cook after having heard/seen him perform.
Cookie Neutron: - David's hairstyle on Top 2 Night and during some concerts on the Gratitewer. So named because it resembles the fabled 'do of cartoon character Jimmy Neutron.
Cooklective: - the collective fandom; those who have been assimilated by David Cook's talent and persona. Resistance is futile.
DC=42: - (Inspired by The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, by Douglas Adams) At the end of the day, everything starts, runs and ends with David Cook. Used when a fan sees direct or oblique evidence of David Cook in everyday life.
DC Drinking Game: - A game in which a David Cook fan must take a drink of an alcoholic beverage any time David says any of the words listed at the end of the glossary.++
Double Boiler: - the Mavid dances or anything involving gawking/ogling David Cook and Michael Johns at the same time.
Elf Boots: - Type of long, pointy-toed, often ornately decorated cowboy boots that have 'uplift' on the toe end. David Cook favors and often wears elf boots.
FlashDance Dave: - a reference to the performance at which David poured a bottle of water on his head and then shook it out of his hair, causing his ear monitors to short out and inducing spontaneous ovulation amongst his female fans. Caused consternation amongst TPTB.
FlexiDave: - David performing a deep bend backwards similar to a yoga move known as "The Fish" while playing his guitar. Responsible for sprained MCL ligament, not to be seen again on the tewer until Grand Rapids, probably due to euphoria from having been on Oprah.
Gratitewer: - gratitude tour; the 2008 American Idols tour, during which David Cook is expressing his gratitude to his fans 165 times (53 tour stops x 5 songs).
Hair Cut Heard Round The World: - the new hairstyle David had for his performance of Little Sparrow during Top 9 (Dolly Parton) Week. Acronym: HCHRTW.
Hairvolution: - The evolution of David's hairstyle(s) through the course of the season 7 Idol competition.
Hollywood Curl: - David's hairstyle during "Hollywood Week" auditions.
HT Flatiron: - The flat-ironed hairstyle David had when he sang Happy Together
Locktopus: - David's hairstyle for several of the earlier finalist rounds, when he sang ARN, Hello, Day Tripper, Eleanor Rigby and Billie Jean.
Magic Rainbow: - Cringe-inducing lyric from David's first single, Time of My Life; now a nickname for that song.
Mavid: - nickname for the duo of David Cook and Michael Johns. Also for The Dance that takes place during Please Don't Stop the Music.
MOABO: - (pronounced moh-AH-boh). M is for Minions. DC fans who prefer him with bling. See: OABO.
Milk 'n' Cookies: - David Archuleta and David Cook.
Our Accessory Bedazzled Overlord: - (a) Nickname for David Cook when he is fully regaled in an array of necklaces, belt-buckles, scarves, sunglasses, etc, especially on the Gratitewer. Acronym: OABO. Original phrase: "I, for one, welcome our accessory bedazzled overlord."
'Plode: - (a) A word David coined when talking about Eta Carinae, a bright star in the galaxy. He wasn't sure if it would implode or explode so decided on 'plode. (b) The effect that David Cook has on women who are charmed by his voice, his looks, and his size 13s.
Size 13s: - (a) the size of David Cook's feet. (b) Innuendo for DC's manly bits.
Snickerdoodle: - A more subtle (heh) reference for DC's manly bits.
Soggy Cookie: - refers to David's tendency to tear up/get emotional onstage or off.
Skittles: - a nickname for David Cook. See Magic Rainbow.
Tewer: - how David pronounces "tour"; rhymes with sewer.
Transporter Accident: - David's hairstyle for Top 5 (Neil Diamond) week (and possibly for HLTW and Baba O'Riley?)
TWIK'd: - Becoming very emotional or soggy in response to David becoming very emotional or soggy.
Wardrobe malfunction: - David losing his belt in Grand Rapids,flashing his belly in KC, and otherwise sending females into various stages of 'plosion.
What Happens in Vegas: - David's hairstyle the weekend the Top 4 visited Las Vegas. Possibly the father of Cookie Neutron.
Word Nerd: - (a) David's own description of himself, as a lover of word puzzles and games. (b) Generically, a David Cook fan. (c) A DC fan who has obtained an "official Word Nerd number" from the Cook forums at AmericanIdol.com.

Anyway, I just don't know quite what to think about all this.

Except that think I like mine better...
Omg! So just how embarrassing is THAT??? hahaha

By the way... I actually saw him in Grand Rapids and really, really liked him! But not nearly enough to try and learn a whole new language...

2 comments:

Carolina Clay said...

Chardonnay,

Fun read with thnx to your web-surfing friend! LOL, not just us, for sure!

Have a great week!

Caro

Carolina Clay said...

Chardonnay,

With my initial missteps in setting up a poll and the subsequent announcement of "The Very Best of Clay Aiken" playlist, be forewarned that there will be a funny segment about all this in an upcoming Carolina blog.

Thank you for all your list making, voting, emails, and comments. I changed the premise of the poll, which is set in stone to continue through 3/3; and, lo and behold, people are still taking the survey!

Have an awesome week, friend!

Caro